I really don't understand this i'f I'm being totally honest.
Your hear about kids with ADHD but how come this wasn't around years ago? I know tons of kids who misbehave. They all are mysteriously diagnosed with ADD or ADHD. I truly believe there's nothing wrong with them, but it's their parents that have bad parenting skills.
Isn't it funny how they're not diagnosed until they do terrible things and act like uncivilized children? My in-laws act like this, I believe there is a "name" for every condition and behavior out there.
If you're asking me, ADHD can be diagnosed to every kid out there who is unruly, who has an absent parent, and has a cocky attitude. Sorry...but you have no idea !...plus kids with both parents do have these conditions. Report It
50 years ago depression and post-partum depression were unheard of and men and women who had it were "wimps".
Autistic and kids with Down's syndrome were put in special institutions and nobody talked about them. See where I'm going with this?
Society is becoming much more open and mental and psychological issues aren't a taboo anymore.
That being said, some doctors are overly eager to prescribe ADD medicine, and some parents do use it as an excuse for lazy parenting. However, there are kids who truly have it, and who benefit a lot from proper medications and a change in lifestyle. I had ADD when I was younger, and I was a genuine case. I was not hyperactive, but I had it pretty bad. But I am thankful that my mother never put me on medication and decided to send me to a different school. I turned out better because of it. Meds would've turned me into a zombie.
Even my father had it when he was a kid. It was unheard of years ago because they thought that kids were just being lazy or insubordinate. Their method of treatment was a belt to the bottom.
ADHD is real, but it does not mean your child had carte blanche to be naughty and do whatever he wants. My little brother only had a viable excuse for his behavior because he had autism. More times than not, ADHD can be misdiagnosed, intentionally or unintentionally, and for the reasons stated here in other people's answers.
See what paths of treatment are open to you, but I highly recommend you take every path available before resorting to Ritalin. Your child sounds like he needs more discipline and structure in his life. While it's true that there are people who wish to label their children as having a disorder of some sort "just because", there are many children who do very much legitimately have these disorders.
No, it's not an excuse for naughty kids. For some, it might be, but for others, it's not. They've been around, for quite a long time, however, back then, unfortunately, they were just labeled as "naughty kids" and nothing was done to help them. Parents were told that they aren't parenting their children, and that's really sad. They were desperate for some sort of help but were shunned and just told that their kids are "bad", while in reality, there was really something going on.
BoSox27 said it perfectly, she hit the nail right on the head! I do not know anyone personally with ADHD. But my opinion is that I do think that some children are more active than others, and are sometimes misdiagnosed as being ADHD. Other times I think that children have a sincere problem where they can not control themselves. They have a hard time focusing, staying on task, sitting still, and/or remaining calm. There are also different severities of ADHD, so I am sure that when they are diagnosed, their medication (if parents choose to go that route) is properly dosed.
I think that because children go through stages in childhood, parents and Doctors should not immediately assume ADHD is the answer. Many things can contribute to a overly active, under attentive child (i.e. diet, sleep habits, etc).
I'm sure that children (and adults) of years ago also showed signs of ADHD. They were probably disregarded because it wasn't well known. Now with advances in medical science, Doctors can diagnose with more accuracy.
I hope this helps! Some kids are not very difficult to look after, they are calm by nature and have irregular tantrums-if your lucky enought o have a child like this then you'll never truly understand how hard parenting is.
I was a very easy baby & child, I loved to read,smiled almost 100% of the time and no matter how hard life was I coped with ease. My younger sister was a nightmare, she had lots of tantrums each day,would scream at everything, wanted her own way otherwise she'd play up something rotten, ran around like she was on speed,hardly slept and couldn't concentrate long enough at school so became frustrated and naughty.She also became emotionless,even though at times she would be a sweet girl,most of the time she didn't like affection and would push people away. As a result everyone around her started to resent her for being such a menace.
To me this is not normal and isn't healthy for the child in question or the parent,no matter how good you are at being a parent if you have a child like this then you will struggle to cope.
Walk a mile in someone elses shoes before making assumptions. I think ADHD does exist and always has, it's only in recent years that it can be officially diagnosed by a doctor. However, I do understand how ADHD and 'naughtiness' can become blurred and I think that it's down to parents and carers to make sure they don't make excuses for their children's behaviour, because the children pick up on this idea very quickly and are basically taught that they are not responsible for their actions. Bad behaviour is still bad behaviour even with ADHD: the difference between good and bad behaviour maybe just needs teaching in a different way.
Jo x It's an easy way out for all. Doctors can diagnose it without pointing the finger at the parent for bad parenting and without spending time looking for a deeper cause, like bad diet. Parents can blame the illness rather than themselves. And drug companies get to sell the drugs to cure it and all the other drugs to cure the side effects of the first drug. In addition, they start people on medication at a much younger age! So everyone's a winner. Except for the kid.
So yes, I think it is an excuse for naughty kids. Based on your logic, cancer didn't exist until it had a name. Now there are so many people getting chemo and using it as an excuse to lie around in bed. The nerve of them, right?
I could also say that agoraphobia is fake, and you're just using it as an excuse not to leave the house. Just proving a point, after all.
ADD/ADHD was around, but it didn't have a name yet. What's more is that TRUE ADD/ADHD can be detected via MRI imaging; people with it use a different planning sequence than those without it.
Do I think it's often misdiagnosed? Yes. But that doesn't mean there are real cases in which it's very real. I am the parent of a child with ADHD, and until you have parented such a child I dont think you should judge. He is now on medication (not Ritalin) and it helps greatly with his concentration. He is not like a zombie, but can now concentrate in school and is fulfilling his true potential. He has no self modification whether positive or negative, no impulse control and used to get frustrated if he could not get his point across.
The pills have helped he can now sit at the dinner table and hold a conversation, can work at school and has not been in detention or any other kind of punishment.
He still can be very hard work, we are not lazy parents and have several methods in place to keep him on track which in actual fact take up more time than raising our other children.
I would not be without him for the world, he is our shining light, in what would otherwise be a very dark world. I think its all down to very bad parenting and peer pressure.
This kind of behaviour just didn't happen in the 50's when I was at primary school it didn't matter how poor or well off your parents were you knew how to behave and it never crossed you mind to do the things the children of today do. I think it could of started in the 60's when the teen pregnancies started to get epidemic what with all the free love man thing and the drugs started also alcohol abuse. Teachers started to get beaten up in schools.Some teenagers got really bad attitude problems and some of the girls subsequently got pregnant and didn't do a very good job in bringing up their babies who lacking in a decent upbringing turned out worse than the girls who gave birth to them. This process has continued to increase year by year until you are where we are now. Successive governments have thrown more and more money at these problem families giving them the signal to keep going in the same manner and attitude that the world owes you your keep. So what have we now? children giving birth to children who don't have the first idea how to look after or bring up a baby they also dont know that you can only have what you work for or can afford because they have been taught they can have anything they want the state will provide. Some children dont know what its like to have any working relative in their family and extended family. The do not smack your children brigade didnt help and removing the belt from schools added to the problems there. So now we have children, their parents, their grandparents and even their great grandparents who dont know how to behave or any idea of common decensy. So as for ADHD I dont think so its just a fancy title for parents that have done a rotten job in parenting because they probably have no idea because their parents hadnt got a clue either. I know Im going to get the thumbs down for this but just think about it and see if you can come up with a better reason for ADHD. Some but few children really do have mental or behavour problems most are just badly behaved. Leukemia wasn't around years ago either - do you think people make that up? Multiple sclerosis? Alzheimers?
Our medical understanding gets better all the time. We now know more about how the brain works (and how sometimes it doesn't work quite right) than we used to.
That said, in an awful lot of cases I suspect parents say their kids have ADHD because it's easier than taking responsibility for bad parenting. It's normal for kids to be active and to have problems concentrating. ADHD is the end of the spectrum where, even when they want to, they simply can't. It isn't an excuse for kids who have never learnt to behave. yes it was around...there just possibly wasnt a name for it. it also not "just an excuse for naughty kids" proffesionals have put in a lot of time and effort to study disorders such as this and many others Including learning diffulties. and to prove that we dont all learn in the same ways. for example..it has been proven that most kids with say ..adhd or dislexia usually have a higher than average IQ. Years ago people with problems such as these were labelled "stupid. Because we didnt know enough about them. This is a problem that has faced parents for as long as I can remember. I am a male who took care of two kids who had this disorder when I was in High School. The girls were afraid of them and made it difficult for them to go out.
Attention Deficit was the first label attached in 1960's and Hyper Activity was added years later.
Now I believe this is a by-product of poor parenting. Many are to lenient and allow their kids to run over them as the others are so strict that kids away from the parents release the build-up of energy. Parenting is a balancing act and must be done well as our future depends on them BoSox27 took the words right out of my mouth. It is a real disease and it can take over your life. I always knew something was wrong with me once I hit middle school. I couldn't concentrate, after reading a chapter I couldn't answer any questions about it etc. I didn't graduate because by high school I had given up. So I got some Adderall, got my GED and went to college. All this after I was 18 and could go to the doctor by myself because my Mom said the same thing - that it was an excuse for being lazy. I am not a lazy person by all means. I just cannot concentrate. Even if I want to. But yet I am a great parent. Always have been since day 1. My kids are the only things that I can seem to stay focused on. And now my oldest is showing signs of being ADHD. She cant sit still, not even for 10 seconds. Even if she likes the activity shes doing. As soon as someone talks to her anywhere and says "Whats your name?" She goes on and on and doesn't stop talking. "My name is Jasmine and I'm a princess and I'm 4 years old and my birthday is in January and this is my Mom" until I stop her. If that isn't ADHD you tell me what it is. And I seriously doubt that a 4 year old (2 years old when this started) can be classified as lazy. Its a disorder. Like anything else. People who don't believe are just close minded and in denial in my opinion. It is genetic most of the time. You think I asked for it? No. But I don't want people to call me a liar or lazy because of it. it is real. and it is hard to deal with. My son is 12 and has some developmental delays along with his ADD. He can literally stand there and "listen" while you tell him something, then 30 seconds later can't tell u what you said...he was distracted by a fly in the room. I have told him to take his cereal bowl to the sink, and had him head to the bathroom because someone said something that interested him. Or had him try to take his dirty clothes to the kitchen instead of the hamper. And lord only knows we are constantly on him about telling the whole world his business. A friend of mine asked him what grade he was going into and his answer was something like " 6th, and I'm going to shanahan not hyatts because it is a better fit for me and it is on shanahan rd like a mile down the road, and my sister is going to indian springs and she will be in second grade, and thats on home rd right next to the new high school and we live in the wrong place to go to the new elementary 'cause u have to live on the other side of liberty to go there".
the right medication is like glasses for the mind...it helps you focus. If your child had a problem seeing would you deny them glasses because they were not trying hard enough? Or deny a physically handicapped child a wheelchair or crutches because they did not try hard enough to over come thier disabilities? a child who is medicated wrong, or over medicated is the problem. The meds should not take away thier personality, it should help them be "normal" I think it was around. I remember about three boys in my primary school in the early 1950s who would be diagnosed today with ADHD. They were just called naughty boys in those days and did very poorly in school. However, they did come from less than desirable families, so I do have some doubts. In *some* cases it is - it is overdiagnosed in children who simply need firmer discipline in those cases as that is an easy way out for lazy parenting.
In the *genuine* cases the children (and parents) should be helped but *NOT* drugged - discipline doesn't go amiss even if there is a "disorder" present anyhow as they will have to learn how to cope as adults tha same s all other children and having them think that drugs is the answer is not good at all. Pharmaceutical companies stumbled on a drug with very few uses so they marketed it to parents to drug up their kids and make parenting EASY. Parents swear by it because it calms the kid down and they can get on with their lives. Yes it is real. It was around years ago but now we know more about it so it is talked about more. The drugs generally don't work, it is therapy, positive praise from parents when the kid is good. Fresh fruit and veg and no E numbers and junk food. Hi, you are right if the term ADHD was unheard of years ago. The disorder existed for over a hundred years but it was not called ADHD, but by other names. i think its an excuse if your kid is actually a kid thses days- if they are not in front of the computer or on video games they are ADHD- they tried ot say my 10 yr old brother is adhd ebcause he has a lot fo energy but he akes good grades- beccause you're not normal today if you're not lazy Because when I was a kid (sixty plus years ago)
our diet was made up of potatoes, bread and veggies that were, in the main, home grown. No additives!!!! Meat wasn't that plentiful and all other food was rationed!! try walking in the shoes of a parent with a child with adhd its really hard work you get little rest and your other children suffer. i wish it wasn't real but it is it really pisses me off when i see questions like this It has been around-I am 40 and as a kid in school,had 0 attention span,major disrupter in class,clown ,etc. They just beat the hell out of me,but not the adhd... It was around. I was diagnosed with this as a child and I am damn near 30 now. IT is real, cut your kid a break. OMG - this makes me so sad when I hear so many people opting for poor parenting and lazy parents as the reason for ADHD. I was one of those kids who were stood in the corner and still couldn't be still, even though I understood that the paddle was coming after me - over 50 years ago. I tried and tried. It was such a struggle. I didn't get into so much trouble at school because I was very smart and made very good grades, so the teachers liked me and let me by with more. They were sympathetic to my plight and could see how hard I was trying to focus and to stop and be calm. I even had my 5th grade teacher go to my mom and offer to adopt me to get me away from the contant beatings I was getting from my dad. I would come to school with belt marks on my legs - my dad's idea was if everyone could see the welts, I would be embarrassed and try harder. He would sometimes beat me (with the buckle end first) until the blood ran down my legs. This poor parenting only hurt me and did nothing to help me, so his extreme "rules" and beatings for infractions did nothing to help the situation, just gave me a life of years of therapy.
ADHD was said to be diagnosed a few years back in Thomas Edison, Abraham Lincoln and his children who almost single-handledly tore up the white house, President Eisenhower, Beethoven, Stevie Wonder, Mariette Hartley, President Lincoln, "Magic" Johnson,
Benjamin Franklin, William Butler Yeats, President Kennedy, George Burns, Milton Hershey, Galileo,
Prince Charles, General Patton, Mozart, Greg Louganis, Henry Winkler, Socrates,
Eleanor Roosevelt, Albert Einstein, Harry Andersen,
Jim Carey, Sir Winston Churchill, Jason Kidd,
many, many inventors had this problem as well as some of the brightest people ever known. I will include one site for you to read about this for yourself, but there are many sites. People who work in counseling, therapy, psychology and psychiatry, the helping professions have known this for years. This is all based on letters and eye-witness accounts of behavior as well as journals where the ill person described their bouts of difficulty focuing and concentrating and staying still, needing to run or throw things, etc. Or, is they are still living, they have talked with professionals and been diagnosed, then gone public to try to help others understand this so misunderstood illness.
And, guess what? It appears that kids with ADHD are usually quite bright. It is just disguised under the behavioral challenges presented by the illness.
Ritilin was a godsend for many children in one generation. It allowed their thoughts to slow down enough to express their brilliance and to slow their bodies down enough where some, for the first time in their young lives, were able to take a nap or to sleep more than 4 or 5 hours a night. True it had downsides, so docs kept looking.
My oldest son was diagnosed with "Attention Brain Disorder" back in 1971 - he is 40 this year. He underwent a new approach that I was lucky enough to discover. Multisensory integration therapy. It was found that these kids usually walked early, sat up early, etc and did very little crawling as infants. This is one of the tell-tale symptoms in MOST ADHD children, though not all. When crawling is lessened, the palms of the hands and the fingers, where so many nerve endings are crammed, do not receive the stimulus as intended and messes up the messages to the brain. So sensory things take on a whole new meaning to the brain. The need to constantly touch or to keep away from certain textures, even in foods is paramount. It is common to see kids need to spin or jump or fall down. Usually ADHD is usually diagnosed along with sensory challenges. All is the brains way of trying to work out what was missed in infancy in relating to the physical world.
I still hear ignorant teachers in my workshops who express their feelings that hyperactivity does not exist, just bad kids. I hear this a lot when I am training day care providers, so be aware. There is still a lot of ignorance out there, please don't let it touch your child. Teachers can be quite good at hiding their real feelings about your child from you.
What do we do today? Well, some docs feel that ritilin or something like it is still the drug of choice if all else fails. But there has been many studies showing the prevalence of our changing diets over the last 40 years or so has produced the babies born with less ability to fight sensory problems or things like ADHD and autism. So many people have lived off of fast food and foods with little or no vitamins to build a baby on - and it's too late after you are pregnant. That baby needed your body and it's father's body to be at it's healthiest to have a really good chance at health itself.
Now we are finding that diets loaded with natural vitamins and minerals, organic foods rich in fiber, no white flour foods or white rice or anything else white. Fresh organic fruits (so that children are not eating pesticides) to take the place of sugary treats. protein from free-roaming hen eggs that eat organic grain and are not pumped full of steroids, string cheese, black beans and even vegetarian fat-free refred beans, tortillas like the ones made by South Beach that are multigrained, yogurt that has live bacterias. Omega-3 DHA, a good multivitamin without sugar - the Flintstones will not do it -good milk that is organic and has added Omega 3 DhA, Flax by the bag, nicely ground to add to dishes or to sprinkle on top of foods, or flax capsules. All of these things have been found to help children with ADHD and even with autism to deal with their sensory challenges more normally and to stay calmer throughout the day and to sleep better at night.
Along with this, yoga is becoming more popular as classes for even very young children, which teaches the body to relax.
A lot of love and hugs for every little thing that a child does right will have them doing more and more right, because more than toys or ice cream or candy, children crave their parents physical love in the form of hugs and sitting in their laps, even up to the age of 12 and 13 and older. The gentleness will come through you along with your love for this exquisite child and enter the child, making them feel safe and protected and loved.
I hope this has helped. I pray that many people read it. We need to treat our kids differently, it's true. We need to love them more. Well I wish it was heard of, when I was suffering from it and no one could see I was struggling (I had attention deficit without hyperactivity)....all my life I've suffered from this, always thinking I was weird, not like every one else, and keeping myself from letting people get too close to me emotionally....
I'm now 40 years old, and recently I was searching information on the web for a friend who's son was diagnosed with this, and when I started reading, it was like I was reading a book about my whole life....I finally understood that it was not me but a neurological imbalance that caused all of this.
Sure, over time, I learn to compensate, for chronic procrastination, I find ways to organize my life, around my lack of organization, I get distracted often at work, and I have found ways to work around this, but it's an everyday struggle, I just learn to live with all the effects of this imbalance, and there are so many, that affect so many parts of my life...finding out about this finally helped me to feel better about myself, although it's too late on so many levels to be free of all the negatives feelings about myself I believed about me for so many years.
It's start out when you are a kid, but it stays with you all your life, you just learn to work around it and live with it, but it's a constant struggle and more effort to be at the same level as everyone else.
And those with hyperactivy are diagnosed easily because they attract more attention, but those with no hyperactivity, often don't get diagnosed, like me, and that person just feels that she is no good, inferior, lacks confidence, I know I'M intellingent, but the way my brain accesses the info in my memory is different, the input of information is ok, but the output, making sense when trying to use it or explain it, is not always easy...
No it's not an excuse... http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question/ind... |
