Can someone not suffering from depression ever understand?

My bf most likely suffers from depression. He has acknowledged it and his parents has told me that he was on medication a long time ago but stop taking them because his psychiatrist fell asleep during a session and he has hated them ever since. He even attempted suicide though he doesn't really want to die but he thinks it was to get his parent's attention.

He also says its difficult to open up to someone and seek help but at the same time knows that not seeking help is not doing him any good, nor our relationship. I don't know how much longer I can take of his mood swings, of having to tip toe on eggshells not knowing what kind of mood to expect. It would just be nice to come home and see a happy smiling face instead of someone who just seems to loathe himself, the world and everybody and everything in it (except his dogs) and mope/sulk all the time.

I'm trying to understand how it is a person who knows he needs help can at the same time refuse to get it. Why is it so hard

I've suffered from moderate/severe depression for more than 10 years, and when I was going through an episode, I wanted to really get better, but had lost all hope as that's the nature of depression.
It was also extremely hard to be motivated to do anything, but as someone who is recovering well, I have found new joy and purpose in life, and it feels absolutely fantastic to feel emotions other than despair, hopelessness and self-loathing.
It took many doctors visits before I was diagnosed and then it took many years to find the right meds and I'll have to keep taking them for a minimum of 5 years, though it'll probably be for life as major depressive disorder runs in both sides of my family.
Perhaps it is also very difficult for your boyfriend to articulate his pain into words, as depression can dull your senses and muddle your thoughts.
One thing that can work is to encourage him to write down his feelings, no matter how terrible they are. Then when he is ready to give it another try with visiting a doctor, he can take his journal with him. The doctor I see now is fabulous, and she even counsels me.
Don't give up yet, and I can understand your frustration, but you are actually one step on the way to helping your boyfriend through your caring. :)

It sounds like he has become more of a ball and chain to you, rather than a lover. That's not a very healthy relationship to be in.

I sympathize with your situation. You're afraid that if you leave him, he'll kill himself. But ask yourself if you still love him. If not, is it worth to be a hostage to his depression and mood swings?

I suffer from depression myself and know that most people never fully recover. They may learn to cope with it, but a full reversal is awfully rare. In case of your boyfriend, his lack of motivation and resignation is an omen that this may last throughout his entire life.
Try going to Daily Strength. There are many people on the site that have depression or family members and friends with it.You might be able to understand it better or make a decision as to which way you need to go.
I have been suffering from depression since I was 10. You will never be able to understand what we go through. Imagine hating yourself and feeling worthless all the time. Thinking that no one really cares and no one understands you.
I wanted help when I was younger. My mother always said that I didn't need it. I attempted suicide once. I would have died if my sister didn't come home early from school. I tend to think people are dumb, or at least make a lot of dumb decisions. So I seperate myself from everyone.
Getting help now is difficult. I don't want people to think I am crazy. And if you tell a shrink that you don't deserve to live they have to inform your employers or people at your school. I wouldn't want everyone to know my business.
I remember I was sitting in a psychology class in college and the professor asked what are our thoughts of depressed people. Everyone had negative answers (things like they are selfish, scared, etc.). I wanted to scream that I am not selfish or scared. There is nothing I can do to help this. I don't want to be depressed. I want to enjoy going to movies, restaurants, comedy clubs, etc. but I can't. It doesn't excite me.
I don't mean to keep talking about me. The only thing you can do is be his support system. He obviously cares about you because he wouldn't be with you if he didn't. I hope that I have helped. If you have any other questions you can e-mail me.
My life
In answer to your last point I think your BF is a slightly different case to normal in that he was getting help until the falling asleep incident (which i know would upset me).

A Lass i know is diagnosed depressed due to a natural chemical imbalance, part of the trouble i have with her is due to some of the symptoms she can be a real pain in the back side a lot of the time, but i think the chats we have had to get her through low points means i believe i have a better understanding of her. It took along time for her to start opening up to me. how long have the two of you been together?
If you haven't been there you won't ever understand. If you don't want to end up this friendship you should try to be more compassionate and positive. If he knows you're there for him then he'll talk to you. I know it's extremely hard for you but what about him? When you are depressed you feel like the whole world is against you that life has no meaning.. He should also get his medicines. Sometimes pills is the only way to overcome depression