How can we help our friend through Ednos(eating disorder)when she doesnt believe or accept she is actually ill

She is 14 and olny weighs 38kg (5.9stone!) and is reluctant to put more weight on.

She missed a few meals in boarding school but she is now at home. Her dad knows.

It stands for eating disorder not otherwise specified
so she has an eating disorder but its not anorexia or bulumia so she kind of thinks that its not real !

well u know i'm 12 and weight 30 kg. i hope i'm not going through anorexia but i have experienced it before! i guess i'm a little cured but not completely but i surly can help u have to be trying to encourage her to eat more and more before its too late meaning that her total liking in food will be gone. you have to ask moreabout what foods she still likes and give it to her that way she can gain more weight!

Most people with a eating disorder/anorexia/bullemia don't see what they are doing to themselves.
They see themselves as fat when they are so thin. It's all in her head. Take a picture of her and show her what she is like.

I used to be in same situation but till i went to doctors and had blood tests and dieticians and they told me what it was doing to me it opened my eyes and made me realise. If she want to have a family when she is older i would try make her stop. Tell her the risks what is happening around her and what can happen.

You have to be patient though as this is a very slow process of recovery

Well,if she is underage then her parents can take control and send her to an eating disorder center. But in all honesty.it might not even work if she truly doesn't believe that there is something wrong with her or if she doesn't want the help.
All the help in the world can't help someone if they don't want it.

It sounds negative, but there's not much you can do. However, if you're able to, talk to her parents and get her to a doctor's/hospital asap.

Tell that damn girl to eat some food before she dies of malnutrition.
Too many girls are stick thin...
Force her to eat if you have to you dont want her to end up dead.

you cant force her to acknowledge that she has a problem and its a bad idea to try and make her eat as she will find that approach more stressful and she'll go to more lengths to hide her eating disorder. you all should remain sympathetic and positive. always encourage a small amount of food but never force her or make her feel bad if she cant eat - just say that you're all proud of her for trying. i wouldnt keep telling her she looks awful for losing alot of weight or that she looks fine the way she is/was - she'll believe youre lying so its a waste of time. EDNOS is as real as Bullimia or Anorexia and ideally she should seek professional help. try and suggest this and offer to go with her for support - maybe say to her to just have a check up to make sure that she's still in ok shape. you could make an appointment with your own gp and ask their advice on how to help your friend.

i hope you all are successful in getting some help for your friend.

good luck x

Keep talking to her and asking her questions about her views on food, body image, her life.
If she is the sort of person who wont talk about it inless you ask her, you need to ask her to get the information! Dont make it seem like you are against her, or she will only back furthur away.
I think asking lots of questions is one of the best ways of getting through to her and making her understand that she is ill. She might say that you are over - reacting and that you dont understand but thats normal.
The more you make her think about the way she acts around food the more likely she will see that there is something wrong.
If she thinks 5.9stone is a healthy weight you need to make her see that it isnt and get some help to explain the risks she is putting herself in the path of. Her BMI may be on the edge of the healthy section, depending on her height, but if she has been diagnosed with an eating disorder, its likely that her individual weight needs to be higher than this to sustain a healthy lifestyle.
There may also be underlying issues as to how the disorder developed, does she have a good family life? Does she do well in school? Is she competitive with her weight/looks/other girls in boarding school? There have been cases of girls boarding schools where there are competiting anorexics believe it or not.
Try to get through her shell if she is in denial, which it sounds like she is if she doesnt believe or accept she is actually ill. Also find more information on Ednos and explain to her that is it a real disorder!!! Its important that she recieves professional help, but having friends like you who care about her is a large step in the right direction! She is lucky to have you.
Good luck with everything! Email me if you want xxxx