Is a eating disorder anothers fault when your an adult?

Is there anything a parent can do for a child that is grown, on their own and living their own life if they have a eating disorder?
I've tried talking to my daughter, but all I get is negative feed back. She's a single mom, loves to party, party, party, and eat eat eat!
It's almost like she places the blame on me for her actions. It also scares me that she tries eveerything new that comes to the shelves on weight loss. She takes the pills or whatever, and still doesn't follow the instructions about the eating that comes with the so called diet.
I try so hard to have a possitive relationship with her, but all I feel is "hatred". AM I responsible for her eating?
I was the best mo I knew how or could be. ( as I know we all try and do). I was a single mom of 4. I have yes, told her she needs to watch what she eats and how she eats something. It was always her father, when she'd see him, how he'd tell her what a fat pig she was. Am I to blame?

Oh dear no you are not to blame. You are enduring the very worst thing which is having to live with a child who is a problem. The thing is your child is an adult now making her own choices and living her own life. LET GO of trying to talk with her and mainly LET GO of the pain. You dont deserve the pain any more. Try every time she comes into your mind to switch to thinking about something you like whether it be music, art, line dancing etc! Celebrate your freedom from parenthood by pampering yourself. Get a spa day, pedicure or a trip to a fun place. Let go also of blaming her father. let go of judgment because it isnt going to get you anywhere. How much life do you have left? Make it the very best you can .

All parents make mistakes. But, once we grow up, our life is our own, and we are responsible for it. Guilt isn't going to help anyone.

I would suggest that you offer to pay for counseling for your daughter so that she can sort out her "issues" and maybe get on the road to better health. But, other than that, you should not be talking to her about it. I'm sure she knows how you feel; harping on it only drives her to do the things you disapprove of.

you sounds like my mum.my sister had eating disorder,but it all started after her now exb/f beat her.nobody could talk sense to her.than she met a man who is joker and he was joking about her scaleton time to time..probably she recognised on her own.
it seams to me likely to be her father or who knows who to blame..tv,media..
my mum vorried so much,but she just made thinks worse.
good luck

Honestly people r just saying no to be nice. Its kinda ur fault its ur daughter if my mom would have saw me throwing up or not eating she would have beat the crap out of me cuz she cares. my mom raised me right thats y I dont have any kind of eating disorder

You are not to blame. She's an adult that makes her own decisions. Right now she's chosing to not make wise decisions.

You can not be blamed for someone elses actions. And deffinetly for the awful things that her father is saying.

Kids always snap back at the ones closest to them, although it isnt nice-mainly because she knows that you will never judge her or disown her for what she is saying.

Im sure as a single mum, you did a great job, folks really dont understand what we single gals have to go through just to ensure a roof over our families heads. etc,etc,etc.

She will have to realise the damaged she is doing to her body in her own time. My sister eventually came around, and I just ensured that I was there for her when she needed it. But I knew that if I gave the advise before she needed it she would see it as 'just another' person telling her she was 'fat'.

Chin up - let her wait till she is ready for help - and just continue to be there if she needs you.

xx

no yo are not to blame, and as an adult myself who has an eating disorder i can talk from experience, i have the opposite problem but i cannot blame anyone that i am this way, just as she cannot possibly blame you for putting the food in her mouth
its easy when you have something wrong to try and blame someone else, and until you accept that fault lies with you, you cannot receive help
she will come to a time when she sees her problems, and admits she needs help, but acceptance is everything, and whilst in denial and blaming you she doesnt have to face the battle to get better, it will come, but when is up to her
there is NOTHING you could have done to change this, nothing, and all you can do is be supportive until she asks for help, then she will REALLY need you
good luck

First of all it is NOT your fault that she has this problem, I had an eating disorder, I would refuse to eat anything I started losing weight fast and I became bulimic. At first I thought it was just because I wanted to lose weight, but I talked to a school coucleor about it and she said it was more of an emotional thing, see, I lost my best friend to a tragic accident and I blamed my self, refusing to eat was a form of rebellion , it was like, the only think I could control in life was what I ate so I just decided not to eat.
Maybe, it's the same with your daugther, you said she was a single mother, that could very well have something to do with it. She might be trying to cover up the hurt by eating, because food can never walk out on you, or what ever happened with your daugher, food is a form of enjoyment, so eating all the time could mean she is trying to achieve happiness. What ever it is, the problem could be deeper that you think and she may need to see a therapist. Good Luck and God Bless!