How can I get help for my eating disorder without causing too much attention on myself?

I really don't want help but at the same time I do. I know I have a problem but I think it's my choice. I don't know what to do. I want to die, I think this is my secret way of killing myself. But then again I love life. I am very confused. There are two minds in my one.

Go speak to a psychiatrist or a mental health unit. They are required to keep it confidential and can only hospitalize you if you are a threat to yourself or others. It sounds like your weight is okay so I think you needn't worry about being hospitalized (although it might be the best place for you to get proper treatment/nutrition).

Below is a list of Eating Disorders clinics. Call one and ask them the location of a facility near you. Source(s): http://www.healthyplace.com/communities/...

Do you have a adult you trust?Why not ask someone where you may get into some therapy.Everyone gets confused now and then,bravo to you to know you need to get a bit of help! Good luck!
You should really talk to your parents or a psychiatrist as they can help you get over the problems that you are thinking and help you understand them.
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An eating disorder is a painful way to die. And it is confusing: "is it a choice?" "is it a lifestyle?" "is it a disease?"

I don't have the answers, but I have a feeling it has a little to do with each.

I know I needed help, and I started seeing an eating disorder specialist. That DID NOT help me, as she seemed hung up on the old-fashioned notion that it was a "fear of food" I was suffering from.

To get help, it's best to try (at least) to figure out WHY you feel this way (Is it about control? weight? don't like to eat? fear of obesity? looking good? feeling "in charge" of your body?)... Do seek help, if even you feel only half-way like you need it. That's the half that counts. The half that wants you to be good to yourself.
8 years with alternating phases of anorexia and bulimia.
Thank you for posting your question. I hope that people take this question seriously and answer seriously. I will do my best.

I am hearing that you are struggling with a couple things
* Wanting to die, secret way of killing myself
- contradiction is you love life
* Want to get help, but then you don't

My suggestion is to find a trusted adult you can speak to and start receiving help (counseling etc). DO NOT, and I repeat, do not worry about what others think. What others think is their own thoughts and it does not reflect "who you are". Only you know who you are, so don't let others thoughts influence your decision on getting help.

I think you have taken a very good first step in getting this question out there - good for you, that is smart and you are a good person for doing so.

Continue to seek help and I have faith that you will turn yourself around positively. Good Luck.