Should i just kill myself now? i just found out a few weeks ago that i have genital herpes and i had to tell?

The guy i have been dating for just over a month. up until now everything was going well. we think and talk alike, we can spend hours, even days together and just talk and stuff. but now because my ex bf was whoring around there's no chance of anything ever happening. i wanted to eventually find a man to spend the rest of my life with and help me raise my two daughters since my ex husband wont be involved. so should i just kill myself now?

The guy i have been dating already told me that he cant be with me and that the herpes was the only reason. He did say we can still be friends but that's a small consolation. I just feel like that will happen everytime. I feel really undesirable and rejected.

Do NOT listen to anyone who says yes to this. They are either ignorant or just a horses' ***.

This is not the end of the world, nor does it negate your worth in any way. You are still the same person with the same qualities you've have always had. There are support groups everywhere that can help you figure out how to tell someone you care about. There are even dating sites strictly for people with herpes. Keep in mind that a LOT of people have herpes, it's just not openly discussed at dinner parties (then again neither is most people's sex life or recent yeast infection) so don't decide your life is over. This is just an unexpected and unfortunate bump in the road.

I highly recommend seeing a therapist because although it is easy for people to tell you these things, it's not always easy to believe them.

Best wishes for coming to terms and finding peace with your situation.

NO. Any man worth his salt who says he loves you will understand and take necessary precautions to protect himself and you. Herpes is not a death sentence!!!

I feel for you. I found out 4 months ago i have HSV1. Got from my partner who was honest and upfront about it from the start. But we are no longer together. Things will get better. Its not the end of the world. Concentrate on your kids for now.They are what counts at this point. Thats what I am doing. Anyone who wont be with you due to this is not worth it then. Get on meds to reduce the amount of outbreaks you have. And the chances of spreding it to your partner. And be upfront with anyone you meet. I know its hard cuz of the stigma attached, and the possibility of rejection. But not telling him before anything sexual happens will come accross as being dishonest. And untrust worthy. There are lots a great open minded people in the world, you will find one of them. Also dont define yourself by the person your with.

no, killing yourself would be selfish, didn't you say you have 2 daughters! You have not been diagnosed with a deadly disease or AIDS. There a great medications for genital herpes and your life can go on. Did you find out who you contracted the disease from?

No... killing yourself will not make anything better GH is very treatable talk to your doctor about the medicene valtrex,,take L`lysine and multivitamin stress will cause flareups just learn to know when to have sex, if you are smart about it dont have sex while you are having a flareup and if you cant help yourself during a flareup then use a condom you can live with GH you are not so lucky if it were aids or HIV your children need you soo much they love you and need you to stick around for them they will need you when they start having kids of their own,, getting married etc..

I think you know that you shouldn't just KILL yourself.
I mean who is going to raise your daughters then? Their dad?
Having an STD is not the end of the world. It is embarassing. I know you are feeling pretty low right now, but think this through.
If a man really loves you the two of you will work this out.

If a mother commits suicide then their children are more likely to do it too. Is that what you want when you look into your daughter's eyes?

Why would you want to kill yourself and leave your two kids behind, two GIRLS I might add just b/c a man said he doesnt or cant be with you. This disease is treatable and for all you know you might never have another outbreak beyond your initial one....there are dating sites for people who have herpes so all hope is not lost. Go to this website and read up on the disease and dont give up.. You'll find someone who loves you for you. Usually the ones that leave you or dont want to be with you b/c of this are the ones that are ignorant and mis-informed about the disease. Good luck!!
http://www.cdc.gov/STD/herpes/STDFact-He...

dont worry its not end of the world,take treatment ,you will be finr.

Don't let people jump on you for what you said about wanting to kill yourself. Most of them didn't even address the herpes bit!

You aren't alone, one in four women has herpes, and I felt like killing myself when I got it - not that I would ever actually have done so but I felt like my life was over and I might as well end it properly - because no man was ever going to want me again.

And you have had to deal with some crappy guy who ran - something I have never had to deal with. Believe me, if he isn't prepared to accept you with herpes, then he isn't worth anything at all, because if he actually cared about you he would. If you actually want to stay with someone because you love them, herpes is an incredibly minor consideration, if it is one at all. My boyfriend doesn't care that I have herpes.

It may not have helped how you presented it to him, since you are so upset at just being diagnosed. So much is in the presentation. If you have all the facts on hand, don't seem upset about it and don't talk about it as some big thing, most men will not run. Explaining it is just like cold sores on the mouth - oral herpes - usually helps. Since you are very upset about it you probably projected that and that makes other people scared.

Don't think other men won't accept you. I have told four men - not men who were in love with me, except one - and they all accepted it without question and still wanted me. There are plenty of men like that around.

And if he said that to you, about it being just the herpes that made him not want to be with you, knowing how bad you were feeling about it already, then he is a complete and total jerk because if he cared at all he would have known what saying that would do to you. I can't get over just what a shitty thing that was to do.

If you want to see just how not alone you are, have a peek at these cdc statistics for herpes infection - up to 55.7% of women have genital herpes - and that was in 1994. Numbers of women with herpes have increased hugely since then! Both I AND my sister have genital herpes. It really is that common. I'n not the first girlfriend my partner has had that has herpes either.

http://www.cdc.gov/std/Trends2000/herpes...

I am so sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I remember when I was first diagnosed. I felt angry and ashamed and confused - and I was sure that no one would ever love me again.

But I've had herpes now for ten years - and I've never had a man reject me for it. I'm now happily married to a great man (who does not have herpes, by the way) and I've never given it to anyone.

I know its hard. And it feels like things will never be good again. But they will. Honestly. The more you learn about herpes, the less of a big deal it will be. The worst part is telling potential lovers about it, and having to risk rejection. But when a guy really likes you, he'll take the small risk of herpes to be with you.

If you and your lover take appropriate precautions (never having sex during an outbreak, using condoms, and you taking Valtrex) you can reduce his chance of catching your herpes to less than 1%. That's not a typo. Less than 1%.

I'm sorry that you're having such a tough time right now. Please call someone that you know and trust - a family member, a close girlfriend - and let them be there for you. You need someone to lean on right now. And things will get better. Honest. They will.

u don't have to do that. hang in there sice u have 2 kids that depend on u. u can still have a relationship even though u have herpes. finding the right guy might be tough as most guys won't want anything to do with herpes. the trick is to find some one who is willing to accept u for who u are and having herpes. the right guy won't be affraid or won't treat u any different for having herpes. its not the end of the world and your not alone, other people in the world have herpes too.

NO. Nothing in this life is worth killing yourself. We all make mistakes and by killing ourselves because we make mistakes would cause the human race to vanish. Think about it?? Makes sense doesnt it? Best thing for you to do is accept what as happened. Your kids would suffer the most if you killed yourself. And as a parent would you want to do that to your kids? I know I wouldnt. Accept what has happened, realize that your going to be "rejected" so to speak by potential guys, but remember that someday there will come someone that will accept you for who you are and what you have. You both will have the love there thats supposed to be there. You will want to protect him the best you can. Be patient for your "knight" in white satin will come along.

what the F*CK!! Whats wrong with you? life is not about finding a man or a boyfriend you need to concentrate on your children they are the most important things.
Selfish to kill yourself over this pathetic little thing! omg.Would u wanna kill yourself, leaving your two daughters to go god knows where - not to your ex husbond. to the government- into a foster home
omg

First off, DO NOT KILL YOURSELF!!!! This will NOT solve anything! Many people have been in your situation, but they don't commit suicide!

It's great that you caught the herpes before it got to severe, and herpes, while it can not go away permanently, CAN BE treated!

It sounds like this guy is great, and you love him for HIM, not the sex right? If he's the guy he claims to be, he will understand.

You have a responsibility for your children! They love their mom, whether or not you have herpes!!!! They need you in their lives!!!!!!!!!!!!


If you still feel like suicide, please go visit a councilor, he/she can help you. Just try to, as you're going to sleep, list three great things to live for. !!

Good luck! I know you can do it.

yes