For Men: Would you date a woman with genital herpes?

my sister has it and is beautiful and great in every other way, her ex bf was sex addict and gave it to her, she has been with this one terrible guy because i think she thinks no one will want her if they know, i don't think its a big deal, she takes medicine and is never sympomatic, and i wanted to know what you thought?

Btw, it is estimated that 1 in 6 americans have genital herpes

Share my story with her, I hope it helps.

I have been married for 15 years now to a man who had only one other sexual partner. We have two children and he has never shown any symptoms of hsv. I was entirely honest with him, and we waited until a month before our wedding to consumate the relationship. That was my choice.

Though I was open with him, I told him in the dark so I wouldn't have to see his expression. He thought about it (I don't even remember if is answer was immediate or not), and said that it didn't matter. I feared the answer to many other questions about whether he meant he didn't need sex; how we would get pregnant if we used condoms; and even wondered if he knew something I didn't. I called myself 'damaged goods'. I also hoped he would research the topic before consumating the relationship. I am sure he did, as he is a VERY smart man.

You see, as emotionally painful as finding out I had hsv was, it was actually a blessing for me in the end. I was living life for the now, and unable to make a committment to marriage until this vd caused me to sit down and be honest with myself about my values and what I wanted out of life. I was twenty five or so and still single, moving from one long term relationship to another... all ending the same way. I entered counseling and reevaluated what was really important in a relationship. I haven't slept around, but was under the false impression that men who had had many encounters were sexy... I wish someone had told me about the statistics.

One thing that was truly wonderful, was that when he told me it didn't matter to him, I knew in my heart that this relationship would be FOREVER. No cheating, no divorce, no dating again, or remarriage.... that was one loving committment he made to me. He is truly the man of my dreams (and logic).

There are two types of the virus and you can get either one in either place. I already had Type 1 (oral), but when Type 2 entered my body, I developed flu-like symptoms along with the outbreak.

At first I took acyclovir faithfully to avoid transmission, but my sweetie told me to quit taking it after a couple of months. I had a lot more break outs than your girlfriend has, and when I had one, I just asked him to wear a condom. After a couple of months he said that if he was going to get it, just let it happen.

I also remember some point in the first year that my husband developed flu-like symptoms. I told him that it could be hsv, and he just told me to stop worrying. But even then, he didn't have an outbreak and never has had. Although my hubby has never had an outbreak, I'm sure he has to be a carrier of it.


Like I said, we have two beautiful children, (who by the way will be more resistant to the virus since theyy have acquired my antibodies to hsv while in the womb) and we have unprotected oral and regular sex. The only time hsv can cause serious birth defects is when someone contracts the virus in the late stages of pregnancy. I had two c-sections, but for other reasons though. It actually was a relief to me- just out of caution.

Many of my questions were answered in time. He has an incredible sex drive and our bedroom activities ARE important to both of us.

Good luck - I truly wish her the very best. I, too thought I would have to stay with the creep who gave it to me, and I'm glad I didn't. The very next guy I dated, I married and we are stil together and happy.

Tell her that even if she is going to hang on to this guy for awhile, to start looking around and determine what she really wants in a relationship... what is and isn't important.

It can be startling to be sure. My fiance transmitted it to me via orally-can you believe it. Anyway to answer the question Yes I would date someone. Just have to take precautions along the way.....