Would you be upset if someone gave you a book about Menopause as a gift?

That is what my best friend bought me on her vacation. I was hurt and livid. Of all things???? I gave it back to her and asked her if this was her way of telling me that I'm a psycho b*tch.
I'm years away from this stage of my life, and female issues totally creep me out....I just DON'T like to talk about them and she knows that it makes me extremely uncomfortable. (for instance if I see a woman breastfeeding in public I want to run to the nearest ladies room and puke.) I don't want to hear about hot flashes, night sweats, mood swings etc....now SHE is alot older than I am, and she IS going thru this stage of her life....what the heck was she thinking when she bought this? I'm trying to figure out if it was in insult, sick joke or what. We know each other very well, have been best friends for 15 years..so there is no question that she knows that something like this would upset me.....

I don't want to talk about, read about, see it, hear it, feel it....I would never have the gall to give someone a "gift" like this. Even her husband told her not to buy that, he said it was a bad idea and in very poor taste for a gift...I guess he knows me better than she does.

I think it was just some kind of weird joke gone wrong..

Personally I'm the same about all things feminine and icky... =p I hate it when women announce they're on their period, I hate it even more when if you're feeling down and someone goes "oo is it your little hormones acting up!" its so insulting!

I think you just need to ask her what the hell she was thinking and explain to her that you would think that she'd know a "gift " like this would upset you?

she thought that she was being helpful.
she knew that it was something that you would feel uncomfortable talking about and would need to know about eventually.

or have you thought that maybe she was looking for some support in this difficult time in her life. maybe she was trying to let you know that she's having a hard time and she needs someone to lean on.

Some people have a weird sense of humor. Is she into "gag" gifts? I personally hate the "Over the Hill" gifts for a 40th or 50th birthday. Perhaps she was trying to be funny, but seriously misjudged your response. I think you should not let 15 years of friendship be jeopardized by this lapse in judgement.

i would laugh and laugh and laugh.
and scream my vaginas bleeding!!!!!!!!
hahaha.
i didnt read your whole entire long story, so sorry if i offended you.
thats what i would do if someone gave me a book about Menopause as a gift.
and im only 16 so it really doesnt apply to me at this time in my life.
be chipper!

She thought she was being helpful. She knows you don't like talking about those issues so she bought you the book so that you could consult it as you needed, when you will need it, privately.

maybe she thinks you are not very caring or are ignorant toward her condition (menopause) and doesnt feel loved by you for what she is going through and it was her way of helping you to note this significant event in her life

Maybe you are overreacting? If you are an adult, you shouldn't act so childish about women's issues. Maybe she thought it would be enlightening.

yes i would be upset if some one would give me a book on menopause.

Noo! It happens to everyone

Maybe it wasn't the perfect gift, but on the other hand - chill.

I can see why she might have thought so, sheesh...

You mean she only gave you one? The nerve of her. I'd be upset ,too

I can understand where you are coming from. I'm 48 but had a hysterectomy at 25 because of my first bought of Cancer. Now I am dealing with the MP word. I don't like to talk about it and don't like to think about it. I went directly to the doctor and dealt with it. It is private and not a lot of women like to deal with it with other people. It is EXTREMELY private and she brought you that back from VACATION???? She is your friend? I would have just told her honestly how badly it upset me so she would never do it again. My friends now how I feel and would never, ever say anything to me about it. You are not wacko or crazy...you are sensitive. She was wrong. You have a right to your privacy..especially about such a private matter!! Good luck...talk to her..don't let this matter go...she'll do something like this again.....

Wow are you uptight. Surprised you have any friends at all. First of all, what makes you think that she gave this book to you because she thought you were getting old. She may have given it to you so you could understand what she is going through. After all you are suppose to be her friend. You have some real issues when it comes to sex and life things that are real and you have to face. It was very rude of you to give the book back. You should have read it, maybe you would learn something. You think seeing a mother breast feeding her baby is sickening? Wow. You are a piece of work. I hope she never speaks to you again. I sure wouldn't want you for my friend.

Honestly, I don't think she is being mean - I think she means well and feels you need some type of background on the topic. Tell her you are upset, ask her to please understand it's a topic you don't wish to discuss.

When you are ready, you can go online and look up those topics, there are tons of resources available and even forums to discuss it without anyone knowing who you are.

As for me I'm 50 and gone through so much of that stuff, the ups & downs. My friend was thrilled I was turning 50 and talked about it for four months non-stop. It's not an issue for me, but she was just happy I was as old as she was. I view it as her insecurities. Age is just a number to me. Again, in this case, I think she is just offering some wisdom and medical knowledge that may benefit you. No reason to discuss it if you are not comfortable though. :)

For god sakes, there is worse things in the world that could happen....!!! if she died tomorrow how would you feel about this whole situation then??? You would probably think it was stupid and be sad because you overreacted. Something you should really consider because those things happen all the time. Lighten up! It's really not that big of a deal.