I am 22 (almost 23) and I have never had an orgasm. I know some women don鈥檛 come until they are older; and Id be fine with waiting to come, but I think I have something more serious.
When I am given oral sex, I sometimes start to pee, I can stop it; but if I don鈥檛 use my muscles to hold in the pee then I will start again. This happens even if I go pee right before we start doing anything. If I start to go, I didn鈥檛 even realize I was about to, I stop it immediately, get back to doing what we were doing, and then it will happen again.
When I masturbate in the shower (inside the vagina, not outside) it feels good, but then I pee; I know for sure its pee-it smells like it and is yellow. I have tried to research online 鈥減eeing instead of Cumming鈥?but its all guy related; and I鈥檝e tried 鈥渘ot being able to ***鈥?but it doesn鈥檛 relate to me.
I have never been raped, molested, etc. I have been with one-night stands, and I have had long relationships. I have had 4 partners in my life; starting activity when I was 15. I got with my now current husband when I was 16. We have tried everything. I am ok with not being able to ***, but he thinks he is doing something wrong; but he isn鈥檛. The second partner I had was probably the best I鈥檝e ever had, felt amazing, but I never felt anything 鈥榮pecial鈥?
ALSO, I hardly ever regain the vaginal fluid to keep myself moist during sex: if it lasts more then 5 or 10 minutes I have to use lube.
I don鈥檛 feel like I really get horny (maybe a couple times a year I will); I often have sex or masturbate because I know it feels good, but I don鈥檛 have to have it. I am often times just perfectly happy if he is a minuteman. I feel horny everyday, like when I wake up, because I have to go pee. But as soon as I go pee, I don鈥檛 care if I have sex. I never sweat during sex either. Like I said, the only time I feel like I am truly horny is just a couple times a year.
I am overweight; but I have been masturbating and such since I was 11, and I wasn鈥檛 obese back then, and wasn鈥檛 able to orgasm.
I have never had any health issues; healthy as a horse. I eat healthy now; exercise an hour a day. There is no change to either the orgasm thing, the pee thing, the lack of sex drive thing, or the dryness thing.
Oh, and Im not on any medications; not even birth control.
And masturbating has always only felt good on the inside鈥擨 have never gotten pleasure from playing with myself on the outside; when I learned to masturbate when I was 11, I didn鈥檛 even know you were suppose to play mainly with the outside area; I always just did inside.
Please help! I want a normal sex life! (like I said, I am willing to wait until I鈥檓 older to ***, but everything else too鈥?argh!) I didnt say I didnt get pleasure from sex; it all feels really good; but I just dont ***. There is no way that I could be cumming instead of what I am thinking is pee--like I said, I can control it, I can hold it in; it never feels special, it just feels like Im peeing.
Also, I dont see how it could be psychological--like I said, Ive never been raped, molested, etc. I am a perfectly healthy 22 year old (minus being over weight). I am comfortable with my partner, and I dont think about cumming, so Im not stressed about it. Ive done everything that Ive researched has said, and nothing. Again, I know ALOT of women dont *** until they reach around 30 years old, and I am fine with that, but its everything else that has me worried.
I am also wondering if maybe I have to much testosterone in my system or something and if that would be causing me to have these troubles? the reason I think that is because I grow alot of hair (have to shave everyday). I am thinking that what you are explaining is a form of incontinence that has to do with the make up of your bladder. read this article
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science?_ob...
A medication for the bladder, like detrol LA (i take it due to a dropped bladder since hysterectomy) may help control that issue.
Also, i find it interesting that it happens exclusively during sex, even with masterbation. Sometimes when I get close to climax, it feels as if i have to pee but i never have. Maybe that is just how your orgasm feels but it never completes as you hold the urine in. U may try to keep masterbating (like in the shower) past the point of urinating. The urine comes out of the clitoris so naturally clitoris stimulation could reflexively make you pee. If you try clitoral masterbation, don't use your fingertips, use your fingers, held together, and rub whatever way feels best. Close your eyes, relax and think of the sexiest thing possible. Do not worry about peeing...if you have to, just do it and keep going and see if anything happens.
This website is a good article that addresses doing this during intercourse but no other times! Please feel free to email me! susan_lpn_2004@yahoo.com Let me know how your doing! it is ejacualtion it will smell liek pee because it is coming from the bladder. if it is small in amount, it is not pee. for exmple 3 tablesppons. or 2. not having pleasure from sex is a psychological problem Have you tried a vibrator (for the "outside") ? The vast majority of women find it easdier to come that way than "inside". Try one of the egg-shaped ones that attached to a little remote with a cord....adamandeve.com have them.
There are some great books out there at amazon.com on this subject - "For Yourself" (the newer version) is a very good one to start with, as is "Becoming Orgasmic". Avoid the "101 ways to be a crazy multiorgasmic sexual monter in bed" types of books...not helpful! Also google "preorgasmic", too.
You are not weird or abnormal in any way, and as long has you have a loving and fulfilling relationship with your hubby then you are not "missing out" on what "everyone else" is doing. Don't believe the oversexualized hype the media throws at you..."everyone else" is NOT spending every spare moment in complete sexual bliss! |
